[The taste of lemonade on your lips, homemade but poorly made, too much sugar and not enough lemon. The citrus is a ghost on your tongue and swallowing it down is harsh and gritty. But the ice is soothing against your skin when the heat is beating you down into the dust of the old road people tell you not to wander down.]
Y'all I was so excited to drink this!!! Sakura Scented Nectar Peach. Its sweet (almost syrupy but in a good way) and fruity with a floral underlying flavor. I live love love it! It is literally pureed white peach with sakura extract. And absolute delight to drink! I'm going to look into getting more of this limited availability drink.
This house is haunted.
Yes people have died here, but they were already wanderers. It would be ridiculous to say they would stay in a place like this.
It goes without saying, that if a place holds enough negative energy for so long, it will attract things. Other energies? Spirits? Ghosts? Sometimes they stay long enough to get stuck there. Our negative influence in the living realm can bind them to a place and even deform them.
I think at least.
I see her sometimes and wonder, "will she be here forever?"
If this house wasnt haunted, it will be when my family dies. I can't tell if this place or my bloodline is cursed. But I know now that what's happened here will keep a lot of souls from...heaven or reincarnating. The damage is done. There wasnt time to heal.
Thinking about that one time when the guy guarding the tomb of the unknown soldier in D.C. yelled at me to stop leaning on the guard rails.
And in other news I think I'm seeing things e.e
Major ed tw.
I'm not trying to glamorize anything. I'm not pro-ED. Just a disclaimer
Maybe I shouldn't out myself here but I need to vent where none knows me I guess.
I binged today. I binged so.much that my stomach is swollen. I'm already fat but now i feel even fatter and worse out of control. I just need to take control of myself. Idk where the willpower came from those 6 months I basically starved myself. Since I moved home to Louisiana I can't restrict at all. I just keep binging over and over. I dont even purge anymore I just fucking eat. In my head I keep telling myself "loose the next 90 pounds " and for a a few hours maybe even a day I can believe in myself but then I just fuck it up.
And I know it's wrong. I know wanting to loose like this is wrong. I lost 53 pounds like that. But I'm still just over 200 pounds and I feel so worthless and gross. But.i.keep.binging. it just doesn't stop. I eat and eat and eat. Maybe I fast for 20 hours at some point but it's all ruined by 3000+ intake during these binges in which I dont purge.
I know my mental well being is getting worse. And my physical is getting worse too. I'm controlled by my emotions and food and sex (with a guy I should not be seeing at all. I mean he's made it more than clear I'm just an object for him to possess and not a worthy person to date). Uhg...everything just sucks.
I want to be thin. But I'm scared of the stretched skin. I wanna exorcise but I'm so sick and tired and sad and angry.....
I dont know what to do with myself
Interesting how cats always seem to find the one person at the party who is deathly allergic to them
hello, i know this is a joke post on the internet but: cat nerd here 2 infodump, cat lore under the cut--
People often don't seem to be aware of the messages they're sending with their body language when it comes to interacting with other species. Friendly/excited humans can come off as threatening, especially in groups; people tend to forget the size difference between cats and humans and not pay attention to their posture--leaning over a cat for example is easily interpreted as threatening, and lifting one off the ground can be frightening if the cat doesn't want to be held or isn't used to it. Even just the way you walk can change how they react; my mom gets sad when our lil' guy Sprocket runs away from her seemingly without cause, especially because he doesn't do that with me (I've been trying to explain that she's moving quickly and seems to not be mindful of how he will interpret her steps. In other words she's "walking too hard" lol--where in contrast I make an effort to step quietly around any potentially-spooked cats and move slowly&deliberately so they can tell what I'm doing.)
Also a general rule to greeting unfamiliar cats (tangentially related-) is to be quiet and still, try to make yourself smaller/shorter such as by sitting on the ground (unless they are on top of something that puts them at your height), and letting them approach you. With cats you're already friends with there's less formality required but before initiating interaction with any cat I tend to offer my hand so they can sniff it. Now that I think of it I'm not sure why I've always done that or where I got it from...It's heartwarming though, because sometimes instead of sniffing they'll rub their cheek against my hand and it's just the most lovely thing. (Unless you're allergic of course.)
I feel compelled to inform you of that time I laid flat on the cold stone floor of the garage for like five minutes to convince a feral I was not a threat to their breakfast. I just think it's funny.
Anyway. Basically, cats often choose who to approach (if anyone) depending on their body language and how that translates into cat-language. So if someone's avoiding a cat they can accidentally come off as the most appealing one here simply because they're keeping a distance. (Also if you're sitting away from the group, especially if you're curled up and stationary, that makes you prime cat magnet material.)
So basically if you want to repel surrounding cats try being big, loud, quick-moving, unpredictable, and staring at them. Or don't because that's rude/threatening but if the knowledge that that's what cats consider rude/threatening helps you in any way then here it is.
so I completely forgot about this but remember when I was trying to grow all sorts of fussy/tricky plants from seed? this is the current only survivor, the henna tree (or at least I hope it's a henna!)
looking a bit rough because of a really bad aphid infestation, but it looks like it might have finally shaken it. it's actually getting pretty close to a year old now, I think!
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